Seven years in New York City. To be quite honest, I still feel like I am living a dream, which I pretty much am but still feels surreal. The little scared girl who moved to New York alone, with no network, and left everything she ever knew behind, became this independent and strong woman who doesn’t see problems in front of her. She sees new challenges! It is so strange to look back at myself seven years ago when I was a naive girl who would get nervous at the first sight of an issue, and now, this woman who loves a challenge. It feels like everything about me has changed even though my goals and dreams are the same.
It is so strange to see how life works. When I told my parents that I wanted to travel, I said that I wanted to go to Argentina, lol… Little did I know that I was about to be exported to New York City and, I have to admit, this was the best thing that ever happened to me. Believe me, I would not have grown as a person and as a professional if I had ended up in Argentina. New York certainly is the place that made me the best version of myself, even though I got slapped in the face several times until I learned how to be an adult in this city.
One of my biggest secrets (well, not that much of a secret anymore since I have mentioned this in previous blog posts), is that I actually come from a privileged family and I was never taught to be an adult or a professional. I had jobs back in Brazil and have been in the fashion industry forever, but I arrived in NYC as a spoiled little girl who didn’t even know how to look for a job in the first place. I am where I am in my career because I put in the work and dedication to make things happen, but the truth is that if wasn't for my parent's investment in my fashion degree, sending me here, and supporting me here for a long time I would, most definitely, not be where I am now - would probably not even be in New York anymore.
It is funny to see how my family and friends from Brazil still look at me and see me as that spoiled little girl. I guess my friends who grew up with me just know me and my family too well, so for them is hard to see me, that young Barbara, hustling in NYC. Recently I had a friend from Brazil visiting. She is one of my good friends from home and she knows my entire family. It was so funny to see that, even with the fact that she visited my house, and knows my job and my friends in New York, she still asked me if I plan on going home at some point. For all my Brazilian friends who might read this, sorry, I love you all but, as of now (and hopefully forever), I am not going back to Brazil! To be quite honest, I don’t even refer to Brazil as home anymore. Home, for me, is New York City.
To be clear, I know where I come from, and I will always know where I come from, I love my family, my friends, and Brazil, but that is just not home for me anymore. All the hustle, the struggles an immigrant goes through to build a life in the US, the struggles of missing loved ones, it is all worth it when you do what you love and you live in a city that you identify yourself with. I decided to embrace the hustle and a life away from everything I ever knew exactly because I fell in love with New York and my career. So I worked hard, I hit my face on the door more times than I can count, I learned and I became better.
Even if the truth is that my parents supported me and my career in the beginning, I had to earn it for myself - which was one of the hardest things that ever happened to me because I was a naïve and stupid girl. Seven years later I can say that I did it and I am still doing it. As I said, I was a spoiled little girl who was afraid of problems, now I am a woman who loves a good challenge. So, believe me, if I could make it in New York City, anyone else can.
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